I am puke
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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