please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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