Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
