it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
