His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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