You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
