i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
