I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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