Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
