when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
my liver is dry heaving
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
