did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
