Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
