Apparently you make a good broom.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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