But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
