And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
