i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Randomize
