I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
