Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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