The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
