1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
