No stitches, just platelets and will power
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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