you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
