Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Best friends brother. Beat that.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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