PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
