but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
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