tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
