Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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