your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
this is an emotional support booty call
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
