Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
accomplished twins. life is a go
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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