So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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