I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
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