There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
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