i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize