I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Randomize
