There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize