I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
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