i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
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