You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
