Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize
