drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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