i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Did I show you my penis last night?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
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