Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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