U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
