Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize
