If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
