I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
