i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Randomize