I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize