I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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