omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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