$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
